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Southeast mediator organization quiets neighbor and family feudsBy DAVID F. ASHTON ~ Don’t wait, mediate One person, or representative of a group, telephones, Porter said, and a case is set up. Case Developers at Resolutions Northwest then call the other party (or parties) and try to get everyone to meet. “When people communicate, in a safe, structured environment, it can be magic,” Porter said. “Mediations have a consistent pattern,” Perry continued. “Participants are stiff at the beginning as the moderator sets out the rules. Then the parties will edge toward each other.” It isn’t over, Perry said. “There is usually a point where it things ‘get ugly’, voices are raised, and the real issues come out.” From there, both sides are led to find ways they can agree. “The disputing parties may not reach agreement, but they do come to a resolution.” “Mediation is a de-escalation tool,” stated Bacharach. “It isn't the last option, but it does help people communicate. Often, the true, underlying question isn’t about a fence or barking dog. It is discovering the meaning of being a ‘good neighbor’.” The organization boasts an 80% rate of success. “What makes it work is that mediation is voluntary and confidential,” Perry said. “Being voluntary makes it powerful – no one is forced into mediation.” So many times, Porter recounted, long-time neighbors start a feud that lasts for years. “We give each side time to vent and say what's on their mind. It can be emotional. After a while, they hear things they didn't hear before. Often the mood changes dramatically.” ~ More than barking dogs In addition to neighborhood mediation, Bacharach explained, their service benefits the community by providing family and commercial mediation. “Family mediation helps calm families who are struggling with conflict between parents and teens or adolescents.” Often, she added, a “teen advocate” will sit in the session, so the youngster doesn’t feel like adults are ganging up on them. The organization also provides mediation and facilitation services to help resolve disputes between business or community groups, easing stress and restoring focus. ~ Peace training As a non-profit, 501(c)3 organization, Resolutions Northwest depends on a pool of trained volunteers to act as case developers and mediators. “Each year in February,” said Bachrach, “we hold a training session. Not only do we train participants to be volunteers, we also teach valuable life and business skills.” One can take the class for $800, or sign up for a year’s worth of volunteer service with the organization. So, don’t get mad--get resolution. For more information call Resolutions Northwest at 503/595-4890, or visit the Internet website www.resolutionsnorthwest.org for more information.
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